Mother: For anyone that follows the blog you know that I retired a little more than a year ago. My husband retired at the end of July last year so now we are working on getting retirement right.
The thing I am finding about retirement is, you work so hard to get there but, if you are like us, you didn’t work hard enough at knowing what you wanted it to be. I think that maybe if we were a couple that had spent the last 30/40 years together that retirement thoughts would have correlated and jelled. But husband and I have been together 15 years and only 11 of those married. We talked about retirement but it was always in the abstract. You know things like ” boy do I look forward to not fighting this traffic every evening”, ” it will be so nice to go away for 3, 7, 10 days and not have to worry about hurrying back for work on Monday morning”. We didn’t discuss “what are we going to do for 24/7 together” or ” are we going to take turns cooking, since we are both not working?”
I knew about a year and a half before I did it that I was going to retire. My big thing was having a clean house, no more cleaning people. I would be home all day while husband worked so cleaning was number one on my to do list. Followed by healthy home cooked meals. Then there was start a blog, go home to WV anytime I wanted, read till my eyes blurred, get my nails, toes and hair done any time I wanted, go to the gym and get in shape. Simple things. I retired the end of Nov.2015, so Dec. was kind of like a honeymoon phase. Christmas is always a busy time so all of my thoughts and plans didn’t really start till after the first of the year. With all the shopping, cooking, baking, parties and wrapping Dec. flew by so it was Jan. 5th before retirement really started.
I should have known that we had not planned well for retirement my first day but it took over a month for it to hit me. Maybe I should say that I was single for 18 years before I met husband. Which made me kind of me centered if you know what I mean. You might have noticed in all of MY retirement plans it all had to do with me. Well husband had other ideas about MY retirement. Of course I would get up at 6a and get him breakfast, would I be home when he got home for lunch, and the number one question of everyday ” what’s for dinner this evening?”. Since I was home all day husband wanted to be home also. I should add that husband pretty much made his own work hours. What this meant was that he wouldn’t leave for work till 7:30a or later, he was back home between 11 and 1130 for lunch, which lasted anywhere from 1 to 3.5 hours, depending on what he had going on that day, if he went back to work, and some days he did not, he was back between 4 and 6. Nothing was written in stone, everything was very fluid. He was already planning his retirement, at first it was going to be the end of March, but then a big project came up and the date got moved to the end of May, then it was the end of June and finally the end of July.
We had a Florida vacation planned with daughter and family for the second week of Aug. and since we have a daughter in Fl. husband and I left early, so the first two weeks of our dual retirement were taken care of. And I had a sister who was staying in Biloxi MS so when we left Fl. we headed to Biloxi, so the month of Aug. flew by for us the newly retired. During this time frame daughter and I went into business together. Having a small business is time consuming. And me in my all about me world, really didn’t discuss my going into business with newly retired husband, I just did it. Big mistake on my part. It is a big bone of contention.
Since this retirement is new, I am breaking it up into three phases so tune in again next week for Phase two.
Pictures are from our Pensacola vacation Aug. 2016.